The Last Day

Yesterday I had my last lecture. Today I gave my last project presentation. Two weeks from now, I'll be having my final paper.

It's going to end soon. Somehow, it feels time went by really fast, even though three years does seem really long.

Next up, the last leg. The highest hurdle. The final sprint. Then comes the next educational advancement.

I had thought today was going to be perfect. All we needed to do when we met at 11, would be to compile whatever we had, print the report, bind it, and head to class happily for the last presentation. It was my worst nightmare. Out of the blue, I was made the leader, which made me wonder if it was because I did most of the non-theoretical work, which was more demanding than typing the report itself. My team mates did produce work, but as most of our work was done at the eleventh hour, I was utterly disappointed. Not in them, but in myself. So what if I had gone 3 days without sleep? I should have checked on them, not expect that they would do everything just in time for compilation and printing today. A herd of lost sheep without their lead dog, make easy prey for the wolves.

I had learnt my lesson the hard way 6 months ago. I wanted very much to have 0 last minute efforts this time round. The opposite happened. With 10 times the magnitude from before, it striked back really hard, and with a vengeance. I hate sub-standard work. I'm thankful I am not my tutor. I absolutely detest submitting work with language errors in them. Just 1 error, is enough to start the bomb ticking. While engineers are extremely meticulous and perfect perfectionists in their calculations, dimensions and drawings, I'm relatively relaxed in that zone. Just ensure the necessary stuff is there, and we're done. Guess I should tweak my mindset a little more.

Now that it's over, all I can do is move on. nothing is going to change the fact we did very little, the bare minimum. It's alright to be average, but it's not alright to be below average. Deep down, I was extremely upset, but there was nothing I could do. My team wasn't at fault. I was wrong not to check on them, to give them that push. Not knowing I was the leader, only made things worse. If I had asked them to return on Monday at the very least, we would have been walking home happily at 3.15pm. The last day of school, I don't want it to be the final day of my formal education.

I am going to make a vow right here, right now. After graduating, I am going to continue studying the English language. If I were offered a seat in a university, I will not repeat any mistake from the past three years. Academics, life skills, whatever's not right. There are thousands vying for those limited seats. I want to prove, my results may not be outstanding, but I possess e the potential to go further than the best.

110111

That's a lot of 1s today. The next time it happens would be in October and November.

The first week of the year passed rather well. Almost, until the first day of the second week. Saturday. The days before, we were setting up, everything was going really well. This year, was the first time I was taking part in the Open House, joining the frontline with the Student Ambassadors and staff. The experience sure was good, and I felt my skin grow a couple of centimetres thicker. I was more daring as compared to during the F1 weekend last year. I must say, the team, my boss and supervisors have indeed done a great job in pushing me. Though I wasn't really into the service-oriented roles, it sure helped me gain some confidence, and improve on my speaking skills! A great improvement compared to 6 years ago, while I was a student volunteer at the Singapore Science Centre, and visitors had a difficult time understanding the words I spoke!

My eyes gained a few kilos as well, from all the eye-candy! Well, I don't know, but maybe I should just hang in there. I have faith that day would come, good or bad, sooner or later. Saturday was the busiest day, and I had to put on a one-man show. Many thanks to the friends who stood by me, for I would not have been able to survive the last 4 hours without them!

Yesterday, I found out from a friend that I had another dream that happened in the real world. The first part of a dream that happened 2 years ago, back in August 2009. I had already expected it, and told my friend, that part of the dream did come true once I found out it happened.

Apparently, I failed my NAPFA once again. This time, it was the shuttle run station which I did badly. Back in September I was able to score 5 points for that station, but today, I scored only 1. Perhaps it was the floor, perhaps I really needed more training. The coming Monday, I shall train for it.

Tomorrow, I would be confirming my grades for the common test. Hopefully there would be no marking mistakes. Hopefully, on Thursday or Friday, I could help with the course counselling, even if I would not be given any accreditation for it. Just want to help the prospective students know that this course, is what they truly want to study and enter as a career in future.

The night before, I dreamt I visited a fair at Suntec or Expo in the afternoon. The booths looked like guest registration tables at wedding dinners. Of course, there would be 2 representatives stationed at each booth.

There were so many booths, yet the place did not seem to be crowded with people. I visited 5 booths, a junior college, a polytechnic, a local and a foreign university, as well as a travel agent. At each of the booths, each time I turned around, I would notice a girl, turning with her back facing me. I felt weird. As much as I wanted to go up to her to start a conversation, I wasn't able to, as I was making inquiries at the booths.

At 3pm, I entered a room where a seminar, meant for students preparing to travel to Australia for their university education, was being held, but was opened to the public. I sat next to a guy, who I did not know, but seemed to be a good friend of mine(maybe I would know him in future). He was going there to study. Just as the seminar ended, he said to me, the girl who I noticed, wasn't the one I was looking for(though it might appear she knew me).

I had no idea who the girl was. 1.6 to 1.7m tall, shoulder length black hair, and wore a grey sweater with a hood, and a pair of dark blue jeans.

2011

2010 went by so fast. Many things happened, but it just felt like a month. It's like running a marathon. Just moments ago, you were striding effortlessly past the start line. Minutes, and hours into the race, you gradually find yourself losing strength and stamina, however the momentum to go on just gets stronger. By the time you notice the finish line in sight, you're in great pain, feeling as though your legs could detach from your body and fall off anytime. However, it's the will to finish, that provides the force, the last bit of energy in you, to complete it. Completing a year, is just like running a marathon. 365 days, 366 once every 4 years, Your age simply depicts the number of marathons you have completed.

In the past year, studies was more on the downside, while everything else, was way up. On Tuesday, January 5th last year, I received my driving licence. Ever since, I had been driving at least once a week on average.

In the past 2 years, it seemed that going to the Philippines was like an annual activity, though each time it was a totally different experience. Saw for myself how environments change faster than people. I went on an adventure race with a friend, for the fun of it, back in June. During the term break, an unexpected meeting took place, which led to a reconciliation with a few long lost friends. Wondering how they're doing.

In June, I took part in an adventure race with a friend in somewhere in May or June, which helped prepare me for a marathon later at the end of the year.

Shortly after in July, I was the official photographer of Speechcraft 2010, a speech contest for Ngee Ann Polytechnic students jointly organised by the School of Interdisciplinary Studies, and the Ngee Ann Polytechnic Students' Toastmasters Club.

I attended a Gawad Kalinga Summit in school and at the National University of Singapore, a Philipine Non Government Organisation which aims to send world poverty to the history books by 2015. Learnt many differences in the ways their culture hosted such large scale events.

Later on, I became a volunteer while being an event photographer for a friend and Youth Expedition Project Delegation Head. Operation Juvi as it was called, an event started by a second year student from the School of Life Sciences and Chemical Technology. It's the first time I was involved in something by the United Nations. Hopefully, I'll be able to return to help if they held it again this year! A day later, I went to Liang Court for an Italian dinner with my cousins, uncle and aunt, who were going to take me for the 2010 New Paper Big Walk, which would be held the following day. That was the first time I stepped into the first floor of the Marina Bay Sands.

Then came the Youth Olympic Games in August. Nothing much actually, though it was an experience to learn night photography featuring fireworks, and putting what I learnt to use just 30 minutes after grasping the basics! Not a very fruitful evening for me, but I did get a couple of good shots.

In September, I had my examinations clash with the Saceda Youth Lead International Programme in Asia 2010, which made it a real challenge for me to prioritise my time. I wanted the best of both worlds, and to make things worse, that was the toughest semester in my three years of Polytechnic Education. The result wasn't in my favour, though I already knew the direction I was headed for. After my exams, I took on my first job with a few classmates and schoolmates, taking stocks and repacking for delivery to two locations during the Formula 1 Weekend, though my main role was a sales associate at a booth. Not my cup of tea definitely, but it sure helped me gain some confidence, and my skin became a few centimetres thicker after that.

September till November were the toughest months in 2010. Long story short, I was juggling between many things, which made it hard for me to stay focused most of the time. October and November were spent mainly on finishing up on a project, and preparing for a big run in December.

December, well, it was one of the happiest, and most happening months, with lots of gatherings, outings, projects, presentations, examinations and events. A marathon on Sunday, 5th December, which was successful thanks to a friend who guided me along(though there were times I got so fearful of him, I wanted to fall so far behind he would give up on me). A day later I had my final presentation, which was the best group presentation we had since the first one. Two weeks later, I had my examinations. Three papers, with 2 expected A grades, and a B or C grade for the third. Results out in the coming week. The last two weeks of December, was well, filled with partying, and hanging out with friends I had not met in a long time. I went for a medical check-up on the 21st, a Wednesday. Found out I had a heart problem, which was very unexpected since I never had anything wrong with my heart. Well, went to get a second opinion on Wednesday, but found nothing wrong. So, I guess it should be fine, for now, until another review scheduled by the government is done on the 4th of April.

2010 seemed rather simple to me, as there were less than 20 big events I took part in, though I'm sure I attended more than 40 events and celebrations in all. 2011, is definitely going to be a better year. I have no regrets to how 2010 ended, but I would work towards my goals in 2011. Some are, well, nearly impossible(since they depend on fate, not on my part alone), but others, are achievable if I work towards them.

4th Panel

If you're soft spoken, you would be deprived of a chance to save your group's reputation when bombarded with questions from the panel. Always knew that, but I would always be left out. Fastest tongues first. Apparently, in my case, fastest did not necessarily mean best answer. I don't know if I should have simply raised my hand, so that my team could let me share my part of the answer with everyone in the room, or do what I did best, step aside, remain silent and observant, noticing time and again, how one answer led the panel on a wild goose chase.

Time management. If time were so merciful, I bet we would all be getting A after A for our assignments and assessments. Though I was determined to do better, the effort I had put in for the past 7 days was still pathetic. Barely a month to go before the common tests, and 20 days before the product has to be 100% complete.

It's over, time to pick my scarred self up, and continue walking. Falling doesn't seem to hurt anymore, which is probably why it's harder to push myself forward. I made the same promise to a few close friends, to do better. I promised myself, straight As with room for only 1 B this semester. I admire, and wonder how a rare breed, who cry when they fall and suffer a minor scratch, pick themselves up after a moment, and sprint, instead of inching forward in what might seem to them to be excruciating pain. Tonight, I shall remain in that muddy spot while I fell this afternoon. Tomorrow, I shall wake, stand up, and make the sprint toward the finish line which seems miles away. I won't give in, till I pass that red line.

Injury Day

The day I felt as though I was being bombarded with 'hurt' missiles. First one came at 5.58am. I was on high alert when I slept the night before, since today's Childrens' Day! Ok, not. I only wanted to make sure I had received an sms of my results, but I wouldn't want to read it till at least 10am when I'm half awake(usual when I have slept for 10 hours). He woke me with an invitation to have dim sum with a group of friends next week. Really apprectiate the offer, but sadly I can't attend due to a school event on the same day. I really did want to see my results till 10am, after enjoying another 4 hours of peace.

Typed my worries into a message, and sent it to a friend, who said it like someone talking in his sleep, except that it was in the form of a message. Oh well, at least it helped!

7am till 9am, my mum was trying to get me out of bed, to get to school to get some progress on my project. I did not dare break the news till I came home, so I just made it seem as though I wanted to just sleep the morning away. It worked. Before that, I was dreaming of my results. I remember there was one where I got nothing more than straight Cs, another I got what I hoped for, As and Bs. And the last, I dreamt I woke at 12pm, and my parents were home talking about my attitude and why I haven't left home for school, leaving me no chance to check my results. The moment she left home for my grandma's after I woke at 9.45, I looked at my results. Simply horrible. Nothing else to say. I deserved it in a way. It's the worst result I had ever had since I started my polytechnic journey. I had been holidaying for the past 12 months. It is time to wake from the dream, and chase it from where I left off 2 years ago.

In the afternoon, I kept making careless mistakes while still affected by my results, resulting in a scratch, crushing my own finger, burning another finger, and temporary blindness from staring at the intense light for way too long. Even till now, I'm seeing a tiny green shadow somewhere in the middle of my sight. However, that did not stop me from going on an 11km run and finishing it in 63minutes and 24 seconds.

The weekend, is no longer there for relaxation. 3 weeks to the start of my final semester(I don't want it to be the last in my educational journey). It's time to prove that I have what it takes to make it to a university. Plans. Local, definitely Engineering, or something related to Interior Design. Overseas, Highly likely it's going to be Engineering or Interior Design, or Medicine(nothing's impossible ya).

Making it known, I feel better.

Mid August'10

So far, August has been great. Not too stressful, not too relaxed, just the right pace.

On Saturday I went for my first fireworks photo shoot with classmates and friends. Learnt quite a lot of stuff, but found it really hard to apply. I was given a piece of black paper, something that was used if I wanted to shoot just one explosion in the night sky. Most of us used a remote, as the shuttle speed was set to the user-defined setting, also known as the BULB mode, where one would just hold down the shutter button for as long as he or she pleased. At the start, I simply thought all I had to do was to just press, and release. For the first wave of fireworks, all I had were photographs of nothing but black. As the time went by, I guess I did better, managing to catch some of the explosions, with 2 to 3 good ones. The segment where the Phoenix mother ship, with the torch bearer on-board, was escorted by her 10 Dragon Boat escorts, was definitely the coolest hands-down. However, the fireworks simply sucked. Compared to the National Day Parade's fireworks, the arrangement for the finale was more disappointing. Yes, the variety was there, but the duration just simply wasn't.

As I was unable to get my hands on the closing ceremony ticket, I shall be joining them again on the 26th.

The coming week was spent solely on our final year project. We did make some progress, and all that's left is the report, some experiments to determine the finalized product, and the manufacturing.

Yesterday, was probably the most eventful day in August. It was also the day I was blur as a sotong. In the morning, I woke at 8am, and took my time to turn on my laptop. It took me 10 minutes to realise I had a dental appointment at the National Dental Centre 9am, and I had not done anything, except to turn my laptop on. As a result, I arrived at 9.20am. When asked for my Identification number, I recited my Student Card Number. Twice. In addition, I let out a loud "huh" when I realised I was reciting the wrong set of numbers. In the end, she simply passed me my queue number. 5 minutes later, I was in. 10 minutes after that, I was back out, getting my appointment. For some reason, I blindly requested to have my appointment pushed back to 5th October from 30th September, although I was able to make it on both dates.

I took a bus home, and it rained heavily just as I made my transfer home. As I left home in a hurry earlier, I brought nothing but my gate key(I had it detached from the key chain as I went for a run the evening before), phone, and wallet. Without an umbrella, I waited 15 minutes for the rain to reduce its intensity before I walked home, only to find myself locked out at 11.15am. My mum had taken my relatives to the museums for a visit, and would only be back at 4pm.

I took an umbrella, went to take a bus to my dad's workplace. 10 minutes after arriving at 11.40am, I drove us out for lunch at a market nearby, before doing some grocery shopping, and headed home. At 2pm, I went to the Jurong Regional Library to do a quick research on some stuff related to the final year project, from 3pm to 3.50pm. I had thought the few of us would be meeting at 5pm instead of 4 in school to prepare a surprise. After some confirmation, it was indeed 4pm as stated a few nights before.

Once in school, I found myself going back out to purchase a few stuff at King Albert Park. 40minutes later, I was back at the venue at 5.25pm. We were preparing a birthday surprise for our club mentor. He came by the back door. I happily took my time to paste the photographs onto a large card. He asked a friend to get some cash ready to purchase some refreshments to break fast with our fellow Muslim members. He walked past. We saw each other in the eye. He went in. Awkward silence. Well, at least the night went extremely well, and he apparently forgot about the card, until we brought it in to be presented to him

Today, our group had a 3-hour meeting at the library to plan for our design and the manufacture of our product. We even met our lecturer and supervisor who were there to get a few books! I went home, and slept the afternoon away after a short revision. Woke up at 5.30, before going for an evening run. Covered 8km in 50 minutes, by far the best timing this month.

This afternoon from 4.30 till 5.30pm, I revisited an old dream. It felt kind of weird, almost as if I was dreaming in a dream, yet I felt awake the whole time. In the dream, I was with my neighbours, relatives and parents, going to Malaysia on a holiday to stay at a bungalow. Here's the thing. Apparently, I was the only child, and the only one who looked my age, my parents looked a few years younger. My neighbours are supposed to be around my age, but in the dream, they looked like 5 or 6 year olds. Everyone else was the same, except that the cars we travelled in belonged to the 90s.

We arrived at 9am, and at 12pm, a young child wanted to trek along an abandoned railway to the country side. instead of by car, with 3 toy pushcarts stockpiled with snacks, drinks and clothes. We were going to stay at a country club till 6pm. My parents said that we had visited the place before when I was younger, except that now they had built a country club near there(they did not even mention my brothers, who were apparently non-existent in that dream... The railway hike experience was a revisit of one of my dreams when I was somewhere between 3-5 years, where I had this white cart with a yellow seat on one end and a long, blue handle on another).One way, the journey would take an hour. This was the thing. We had to walk along the tracks, and about a kilometre to our destination, we had to pay a toll at the first booth. The guard stationed there was short, old and grumpy. The second booth sold drinks and snacks. The journey there seemed rather easy. Until we reached the toll booth. the kid ran past the guard, and as our carts were all connected, we were unable to stop. He started to chase us, and he eventually caught up when we stopped at the second booth to buy drinks. We paid him, and continued on.

Why I had thought it was a dream in a dream, was simply because the country club looked like the Singapore Zoo and Botanical Gardens combined, and it was in Malaysia, facing the sea. What's more, the place even had a golf course, with some holes located at the gardens and the zoo! A friend hired a buggy for us to travel around in. I decided to walk through the zoo, and we caught an elephant feeding session, before I hopped back on so that we could complete a tour of the place.

We went back to our starting point, which was a canteen facing a large swimming pool. Not too far in the horizon was the beach. We had a nice afternoon chat with some tea, coffee and biscuits. At 4pm, there was a warning. Yellow lights were lit and an air raid siren was heard. My uncle told us that the place prone to sudden gusts of wind, a result of the vast open area of the country club. In a moment, it came, and the whole structure shook as though there was an earthquake. After the winds stopped, we saw water sprouts appearing near the beach. I counted out loud for everyone. There were 6 or 7 of them, and they were big. We did not feel any danger, so we went for a short walk nearby. I followed, but went back after awhile. Back at the canteen, I saw someone familiar by the balcony, and went out to confirm it. She was roughly 1.5-1.6m in height, and wore a red shirt. Maybe she was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans as well? I went up, and yes it was her(Apparently, I have never seen this girl anywhere before, and somehow my subconscious picked her up to be someone I knew, and yet I din't even say, or hear her name once in the dream. Sadly, I was unable to remember all her facial features.). We had a good chat, sat down, and continued our conversation over coffee. She needed to go to the wash room, so I followed. Something unique about the country club was that, the taps were shared, except the toilets, changing area and the showers were not(just like Makan Place @ NP, though the colour scheme used was different). When she came out, I learnt that she was there with her family, so I guess it wasn't really a coincidence afterall.

At 5pm, we parted ways. We promised to ring each other up once we're back in Singapore so that we could meet. I did not get to return to the canteen to see if the weather had improved as we were going to trek back to the bungalow. The journey back was tough, especially at the start. The guard at the toll gate was there to stop us, saying that the railway suffered some damage, but if we wanted to carry on, we had to be prepared for the worst. The kid was upset, but stubborn and he wanted to keep going. The adults contemplated our options. A quarrel ensued. 30 minutes later, we decided to set off at 6pm. We had a few more carts so that the adults could sit in and enjoy the ride back instead of going on foot. I linked all the carts together, and we had an engine to help. Somehow, halfway through, I simply broke down, badly. I had no idea why. Even if there was a reason behind it, I can't remember. After we set off, the journey was great. a stretch of the slope that was there had collapsed, and along the way we were able to see the sea and the horizon! It was 7.30pm when we reached the bungalow. We sat down together for dinner, and at 8.30pm, my aunt asked me to the porch, and we had a conversation about my conversation with that girl from the afternoon. I can't remember the details about almost every conversation from the dream, but that one, was filled with lots of advice. I only managed to remember the last part, where she said that if I wanted to, she could send me back home so that we both could see each other the following day. I agreed, and the next moment, I found myself awake, at 5.30pm.

Tomorrow and Sunday, it'll be intensive revision all the way till the end of next week, as August edges to an end and September arrives.

It seems not having the usual conversation for just one day, makes me feel as though something's missing. Maybe with my tone and words, you might find it rather boring? Every moment in text, was lived like there was no tomorrow.

Break That's Close to 3 Months

The upcoming break is almost similar to the one I had during the post O Level period after leaving MI back in 2007. The only difference is that, there's stuff to do at least up till the examination period from 2nd to 3rd September.

Today, I submitted everything that's due and required for the final grade calculation for every module. Tomorrow's a self declared holiday, since there would only be an hour of school, and I had been skipping school in the morning on the last day of the first semester for the past 2 years, so might as well make it that way for the third.

There were 2 presentations today. The first, which was graded and worth 5% for a module, was still rather unsatisfactory, though there's some improvement from the previous one on Monday. The second presentation which was to be evaluated and recorded in my CCA records, was definitely better as I had prepared, though I had to refer to a script.

The second presentation was an edited version of my part from a graded group presentation back on Monday, where we had to present on how we could encourage people to save the environment.

Here's the speech that I planned(in an hour), but did not memorise. It's not exactly what I spoke during the presentation, but it's close to what I presented.

"Everyone, we have gathered here today, because, our mother is very sick. So sick that the only way to cure her, is to reduce, or better still, care for our environment. Mother Nature is crying out as I bring you this message.

We have attended Live Earth, taken part in earth hour, and joined groups on fb, pledging to reduce our carbon footprints. However, have we done anything? Even right now, standing before you, I am media.

Papers, magazines, posters, ads, documentaries, movies. These various forms of media have been infused into our daily lives, for they can be seen and heard anywhere, anytime. What else? I’m sure you must be tired of turning on the tv, and the first few super-short films you see, is an ad, with the line,”DO NOT LITTER”, being played three times over.

These forms of media send a message, to engage all to help save the environment. S’poreans love contests, yes? Spend an amount at this shopping centre, and you stand a chance to win a hybrid car!(COE not included). There was a nation-wide contest to award the household that chalks up the greatest savings in their utility bill for the month. Campaigns to make you buy bags every first wed of the month. Drive a hybrid car, and you get a little of your money back.

We have heard, seen, and experienced. Now that you know what the organizations have been doing, what can you, as an individual do? Save the trees, go paperless. To all aspiring and current Iphone users who burn incense and hell notes, there is a new application that allows you to burn gifts to your family members in heaven with the touch of a finger! You can burn anything from 10 million bucks to a new car, private jet and even a cruise! Examinations on computers, the driving schools are doing it. You get your theory results within seconds after completing the test!

The 3Rs. Cut down on driving by going public. Of course, if you drink, then please don’t drive. Reuse your water. Wash your car with the water you washed your clothes with. You have no idea how strong your household detergent is. Lastly, bring your own bag to the supermarket. Now that you know what you could do, bring those messages home to your families, for the words of a loved one always mean more sense than the words of a celebrity, or quotes from a newspaper.

Saving our mother. do we even bother? Why worry about the next generation if we are enjoying life as it is? That’s true mother nature. We are wrong. She is our mother, our source of life."

Back as Promised

2 weeks have passed. A week of examinations and a week of intensive preparation.

Won't be expecting good grades for the examinations this time, as I planned and did things in such a way that most things happened at the right place, at the wrong time. On Friday, went with the team for their immunisation at Tan Tock Seng Hospital, before leaving with Marcus and Shen Faye at 3.15pm.

The week after was fully occupied. Monday to Wednesday, I attended a standard first aid course, which was kind of like a refresher course, as my certification had expired 5 years ago. Tuesday night was spent totally on packing my bags for a camp the next day, and for the up-coming overseas trip the coming Monday, so I did not study for the first aid test. On Wednesday, found out that I was not going to be part of the orientation camp in April. On that same day, met Koon Teck to collect the First Aid kits and some stuff that would help us during the 14-day trip to Dumaguete City in the Philippines. Passed the course with 28 out of 30 for the theory, and cleared the practical and CPR test. Attended a pre-trip camp after that. THat's the first time I attended a camp for the purpose of bonding with team mates, getting to know the stuff we're going to do there better, all in preparation for an overseas youth expedition programme. Went to play pool with Danial, Iqbal, Mel and Hui Yin that night, before buying supper for some of the others back at the apartments.

On Thursday, ran 10 rounds at the stadium, before heading back to join the rest in preparing for the Cultural Nite performance. Had lunch with the team, and left for our pre-trip community service, which seemed like what a team would do in the I&E in Action Module, under the Community Pathway. Had a strong sense of deja vu once again during the briefing by Melinda at the centre, when I remembered the scene where we were all standing round her as she gave the briefing. Can't really remember when I dreamt of it, and what happenedin that dream, except for that briefing scene.

Today went to get some stuff to pack for the trip. In the morning went to Yio Chu Kang to meet Jacy to collect her package for her kids, before heading ome for lunch. Went out to change money and purchase some stuff to use over there for the 14 days, and went home for dinner. Joined some friends for dinner at Brewerkz till 9.30pm before heading home.

Shall complete the packing and final baggage checks later in the morning, before returning to sleep the afternoon away till 4pm. Tomorrow, hopefully I'll be able to do a short post before heading off for 14 weeks. Would only be able to post again after that.

I'll be on my way back soon. Please wait a little longer...

Yet Another Blessing In Disguise, Perhaps?

All things come in Threes. I'll make a list, before going on to my long story for the day. Lecture today was surprisingly short. Received an email with the opportunity to help change the school. Completed the final paper for ED, with the confidence of an A grade. Bad start for the test in school. Bad stomach upset in school. Did not make the interview for the trip.

This morning, I got out of bed without a good feeling. Subconsciously, my mind was telling me to sleep through the day. The dreams I had the night before, felt too good to be true. Reminds me of the morning of the posting results, though it was somewhat different. Dragged myself to school, as there was a test to be held at 8.30am. We were delayed till 9.20am, as here were some technical issues with the online test. We sat for a written test instead. Went to bind my assignments, but sadly, the lecturers were not in the office at the time. Dropped off the projects and went off for lunch. Went off to the washroom for an unpleasant start to the afternoon, before heading for the last lecture of the semester, which lasted an hour. Went for the final test, after some help from Hong Peng, which greatly boosted my chances of getting an A grade for the paper.

On 29th February, I spent 2 minutes in a room. I felt the same cold, dark feeling which I felt inside of me when I failed my first attempt at a driving test after a near accident with a primier taxi, when I left the room. Here's a copy of my Dream Journal, unedited, dated not too long ago, on Saturday, 30th January 2010. It was just a day after the interview, and I "saw" the results firsthand. What I have here, are notes, as the scenes in my dreams usually jump around from place to place(though the events are ironically able to link themselves together extremely well):

30th Jan'10
day: Sunday, 7th Feb'10 ??
time: late morning/ early afternoon
venue: some function room large enough to hold 40

Confirmation of OMF applicants(announcement by 2 members of panel)
>failed interview
>>students who were asked questions about selves, studies, trip-related = accepted(no names mentioned)
>>>first meeting for successful applicants held on 14th _____(month)??
>joel,glenn,sarah..
[END]

Apparently, the dream started with the flashback of the dialogue session held on the 28th. Somehow, after the session, when everyone went for another round of refreshments, a white board was brought in. A piece of paper covered the board. 2 members of the panel came in. Silence was in the air. One of them said,"students who were asked questions about yourselves, about your studies, or any trip-related questions would be accepted without ay questions asked." They left, without mentioning any names, and with the board remaining in the room. I accepted it as though nothing had happened. In the crowd, I saw only familiar faces. Something that woke me up, was the fact that there was no way I could communicate with my friends who were successful. Whenever I tried to congratulate them, it was as if I appeared to be non-existant to them. Even as they bumped into me, they just walked on to the others as though nothing had happened.

Last Friday, the results were known. Today, the 8th of Februay 2010, the results were released. It might be disappointing, but, it wouldn't be fair to hog a vacancy for someone who's better wouldn't it? Back on Tuesday, 19th February 2008, it was similar to what I may have felt after waking, but today's pain, is nothing compared to what I felt that day. Not getting into the course I wanted badly migth have been a great deal back then, but it has become some sort of a blessing in disguise as my parents might put it. If not for that one extra point, all this might not have happened at all. I got a feeling, this time round, yet another blessing might be just round the corner, waiting for me to receive it.

The next challenge awaits!

A Whole New Beginning, Almost

To many, 2010 is a whole new beginning. For some, it's just a continuation of 2009(2010 is just another number on the calendar). For a few, it's a transition to the future.

2010 is the equivalent of adding one to 2009. one is the equivalent of 365. The past 365 days is the equivalent of countless happenings and memories, good or bad.

This week concludes and seals up half of the things I had been doing over the past 3 months. Learning, not mastering a skill that is useful for life, and something which could be the beginning of my 'comeback'. Over the week, it was just resettling to the school environment after a long break, results of my performance in the previous year and making plans for the next 356 days.

Monday I received the FM and SOM papers. My first 2 As for the term. It was already expected, for I answered the questions in a manner it would seem almost as though one was looking at the answer guide.

Tuesday, I went on a Re-test for my driving. I did pretty well for the warm-up, except my chaning of lanes was a bit of a problem that morning(somehow the error that I did 2 months back had returned). I expected to pass the test with a total of 10 demerit points, but was awarded with 18points. Not bad, with an improvement of 8 less points and no immediate failures compared to the first attempt which had a report which was 2 pages long(good thing no staples were found on the report), with 26 points and an immediate fail.

Wednesday, was a warm-up to Thursday and Friday.

Thursday, received my Calculus paper. Did slightly better than expected, but I'll be pushing for a jump of 3 to 4 grades if possible, in the finals.

Today, I lost my mood to study for a moment when my ED was a mark short of an A. I lost marks for calculation errors, and a missing line in 2 answers. Well, will just have to complete all outstanding tutorials and assignments hoping that should something similar happen, I might just be able to pull it off.

Next week, more stuff would unfold.

The night before, I had a dream of something similar to number 9, except that it was a different face. Before that night, I had others as well, except they're more complicated to explain in the fom of a short story. It's weird. Why am I seeing faces that I have never seen in person? What were they suppossed to mean? It's been happening ever since I had number 6. Could it mean...

Year End Break

4 days of mental drain has come to an end. In its place, a set of projects arrive. 1 I have my doubts about the outcome, 1 which I'm having dificulty executing though its easy to plan, 1 which I'll work on over the next 2 weeks, and 1 which is on-going, but I have submitted my latest information this morning.

Tuesday, Calculus. Papaer was do-able, except that even 3 weeks of revision wasn't enough, plus my weakness in time management skills has returned. Expecting at least a D grade, with marks ranging between 45 to 60.

Wednesday. The day the real thing started(even if I did not pass well for Calculus, I could still focus on Further Calculus). Fluid Mechanics. The first examination paper on which I drew a smiley. I'll be sure to take a shot of it when the papers are back. This paper was up to my expectations, and other than a 15-mark question where I was unsure of my steps, it'll definitely be an A Grade.

Thursday. Things were getting tougher with each day. Strength of Materials. This paper was easier than what I had initially expected, although, like the Applied Mechanics examination from the previous semester, there was a trick to a question. I fell victim to the order of the question, where in order to do part a well, it would be better to do part b first. I re-did the last question thrice. By then, I was definitely of out time to complete the question. I lost 10 marks from there. I'm sure of scorng at least a B+ Grade for this one.

Today, the finale, which also had me making some mistakes. Engineering Design. Extremely easy if one had studied, and extremely difficult if one brought nothing more than a die into the room. Surprisingly, I was able to complete the second part of the paper in 50 minutes. That left me with an additional 40 minutes to complete the first part. I'm not very confident of an A though I am sure every method I used in the second part was correct. Once again, I did not finish the paper.

Went to the CAD lab after the paper with Hong Peng and Yin Feng to do some parts of the CAD project. F1 modelling. Cool, but its tough. We tried to make cuts to the workpiece, but somehow we always got an error message. After an hour, we gave up. Went back, slacked till early evening before going n a 15km run. The first 8km was rather easy, though I was forced to stop at every road crossing. The next 5 was tougher. A stretch of road without a pavement, construction work and more crossings. The final 2, was the worst. The pains I felt after completing the marathon two weeks ago, returned. That was after I went to the Community Club at Bukit Timah for a short drink(water from the dispenser is free for public use, so why not use it?).

Guess it's time to head back to square 1, the 2-kilometer route, for a week, before returning to the usual 10 and 15km routes. In January, I'm considering upgrading the 15km route to a 25km one(which also means the route is totally different), which would mean I'll only be able to complete that distance on a weekend morning. Maybe I'll just keep to the usual, and cover the extra distance when I'm in the mood and when there's the time for it.

2012 'Preview'

Today was the school took in los of water. Torrential rain in school, flash floods at the Convention Centre underpass and Atrium, and a waterfall at Makan Place. It happened really fast. 12.50pm, I was making my way to class at Block 50 via Blocks 72, 51 and 53. The storm had just begun.

Before that, I had a really bd morning. Waking late, taking really long to pack my stuff. Just as I was reaching the bus stop, I remembered I had forgotten to take my Calculus book along, so I turned back, and was almost late for the test. At Block 27, I met someone, though I can't remember who it was(since I was too focused on getting to the classroom as soon as possible). The test which was really easy except for a careless mistake, during CAD. Expecting to score at least 85% for that one. Lesson went pretty well. Went to Ourspace after buying lunch. It was already 12.25pm when we started eating. It was about 2 when someone announced about a flash flood at the Atrium. Our division was the furthest in, and it's located on a hill, thus we did not notice anything unusual going on. Started feeling unwell after that. One moment was feeling cold, the next I was feeling warm. However, I was not running a fever. 3pm, class ended, and I went back to Ourspace to complete some of the assignments due tomorrow, before heading home, instead of going for cca. Wanted to take part in the friendly this evening. Hopefully, I'll be well enough to go for a run tomorrow evening.

This morning, I can't recall a single dream. Hopefully, tonight I'll be able to dream peacefully, without any alarm which would cause an abrubt end to my dreams(I'm always nearing the climax in my dreams when the alarm clock goes off), which would help me remember my dreams with more ease. Tomorrow's the last day of BCE, but it seems that tomorrow is the only day where we'll be having an actual BCE where we don't have to go to school at all.

Examinations August 2009-part 1

Why do I keep thinking that it's only February? On Monday, I woke up thinking it was the 24th of February. Even when I sat down to fill in my particulars onto the answeer booklet, I wrote on the date, "Monday, 24Th February' 2009". I din't notice it until I looked at my watch. It's arms read "1.45pm", and the date read "8-24 MO". Oh, how silly. It's August.

This semester, although I did study hard, I did not study as intensely as I did for the past semester, though I burnt the most fuel and time this semester compared to the past 2 semesters on revision.

Last Monday, Industrial Automation(IA). Slightly easier than the previous semester, but it's more tricky, especially in the case where you have to draw in additional stuff to answer the question. Expecting an A Grade for this paper. Hopefully a miracle would give me the AD Grade for the overall.

Monday, Engineering Mathematics 3B(EM3B). More difficult than the past year papers we tried, but still do-able. A confirmed B+ grade is expected, at least without any moderation. Hold on, do they even moderate the grades of candidates whose grades range from a low C to A+? I only know that the top 5% would get to have an extra "D" printed next to their A grade.

Today, Applied Mechanics(AM). I went to the wrong room for the first time, and thankfully, I wasn't late. On first look, I feared for the worst. I might not be able to complete the paper in time. 5 questions, 120 minutes. It wasn't a killer paper. It's the small font of the diagram on the first question which killed many candidates who sat for the paper today. If the markers are lenient, I'll get a possible 8 marks out of 12 for that first question. If they are strict, I'll get not more than 6 marks. The second question. When I received the paper to read during the first 5 minutes, I stared blankly at that question. Was I dreaming? I can't be dreaming after I drant a can of coffee, right?

The night before, I went to bed 4 hours early at 9.30pm. I dreamt of a classroom with an examination going on. Somehow I could just enter the class, and the invigilator simply smiled, and continued with her rounds. Third row, fifth column. there you were, sitting at the table, right arm supporting your head as you stared blankly at the paper. I stood behind, and I was stunned when I saw your question. Since when were you able to do a question that's not even tested at that level? I wanted so much to tell you how you would do it, but, she stared at me, with that look of suspicion that something might be up. I looked at her and smiled, before she said,"Ok, time's up!" Oh, that's my phone alarm ringing. It's 6.30am. Weird dream, huh.

That question. It was exactly the same as what I saw in that dream. The very first topic I learnt in AM. It's that question on Trusses. The shape of the structure I dreamt of was exactly the same. So were the values of the given external forces. I guess, to dream of a question that's being tested in an examination the next day isn't considered a cheating case right?Oh by the way, that was the first time I dreamt of a deja vu about an examination question, and also the first time I dreamt of seeing a deja vu through a second person.

This paper. I'm disappointed in myself. I allowed over 20 marks to fly out the window. Confirmed B+grade if the markers were strict, and a borderline A Grade if they were lenient. Overall, I'm expecting yet another B+ grade without moderation. If there's even any moderation that's done upward, I'll be able to get an A Grade.

Tomorrow's paper, Thermodynamics(TH). I did the bare minimum for this paper. Tomorrow, you'll see me playing around with the formulae to find the answers. As long as I can understand the questions, I would not have any problems answering the questions wrongly, unless, I did make some careless mistakes along the way. To get an overall A grade, I'll need to get at lest 85 marks for the paper tomorrow. Chances of a moderation for this module are slim, given how well the students did the past few tests and common test.

Hoping for the best for tomorrow!

Happy 44th National Day

This year's celebration was unique. On Friday, woke up at 4.45am. Somehow I managed it as I slept at 2am the night before. Had just recovered from mild fever and alost fully recovered from flu the day before, and hopefully, I won't get chased out by the secuity when we enter the school later on. I took the 6.45am bus with my brother to Clementi, and after 2 years, it was just the same. That morning, half the bus was dressed in the patriotic red. Decided not to wear red this year. I had wanted to wear red at first, but, on second thought, let's try giving this year a miss.

Reached Lakeside at 7.20am, andthey were nowhere in sight. Weirdly, anything tht hasgot to do with meeting friends from secondary school, I'm always early. But when it came to activities with friends from polytechnic,I'm usually either very early, or I as very late. Classes included. 7.35am, Randall and Jin Tian arrived, and as we were way too early, we went for breakfast instead. Went back to the coffeeshop behind the school, and stayed there for over an hour before we went back to school. Like the year before, I skipped clases before lunch time, which meant I skipped the EM3B lecture hat morning from 9 to 11am.

We waited at the foyer after signing in, listened to his usual long speeh, listened to and sang along to the songs, and watched the performance by the students involved in the actual parade on Sunday. The performance was in fact a nice, close-up preview of what's going to happen on the big day. That short morning sure broguht back memories. One again, they had a carnival this year. We were soon joined by others(I can't remember everyone). As I woud be running around a few places the whole day, I decided not to ring along my camera. Thus, there were no pictures taken. Met up and caught up wih lots of familiar friends and teachers while we were there. There were also inter-class games for netball and table tennis.

At 11, the alumni formed a team to play against the current students(mostly players of the school team). I took part as well, just for fun. As expected, I had not fully recovered, and after just 5 minutes, I started walking. It was a nice match, although e lost very badly(which is a good thing). Good thing I informed the club that I would not be turning up for the friendly match in advance that night, as after the friendly match ended at 11.30, I went straight to the toilet to make myself feel better. The match lasted only 10 minutes. At 11.45, Alicia and I shared a cab to school, for I was late for a test, and she had classes at 12.

A cab arrived just in time, and it was a nice coincidence, as, the driver who brought us to school used to fetch our vice principal to school in the past. What a small word! We had a nice chat with him during the journey. Very memorable morning. In the taxi, I felt unwell again. Damn. Let's hope it would be gone by the time I arrived in school. During the journey, he asked if we both knew which school we were in. coincidentally, we only knew that our courses were both from the Mechanical Engineering Division, just minutes before we boarded the taxi(while we were walking to the school's main gate).

Rushed straight to the classroom(still perspiring very badly after the game). How nice, just after I got off I felt like fainting. Bought a drink, and once I sat down, I felt better. In a minute, the test began. Nice timing.For th rest of the day, I was back to normal, except for the flu that was still there. My mind went blank in the first five minutes as I was changing my mindset of the holiday mood to that of the studying mood. Completed the test for Thermodynamics without much difficulty although it was just 5 questions. Went for IA after that, got back my draft for the case study, and we started with the lessons. Toward the end, I became very restless and my mind just switched off.

3.50pm, I took 154 and headed for Toa Payoh Hub to meet Bernice and some others from Joy 5, class of 2002. Maybe I would consider it to be luck that the Meals on Wheels service was cancelled at the last minute, which gave me the chance to catch up with my long lost friends.I was the last to arrive. Everyone had changed so much, although I could still recognise everyone. But, like in the past, the nicknames had not changed very much, although we did not use them as often. We had a nice walk to Mr Peck's home. Drank some drinks, sat around, chatted a little and took a couple of photos before we went for dinner at 6.15. He brought up the old jokes we once shared, and we still remembered the essay where the "buglar ran to the bicycle and ran home", among many others. Sadly,when I said I had to rush off at 7, that was when the gathering ended. Mr Peck walked me to the bus stop and everyone offered to come along. Bernice went off to met her boyfriend, Yong Jie rushed off to get ready for a wedding at pm, Eugene and Andy most probably went home. Took 88 with Wei Yang to Bishan before we parted ways once again.

The part I liked about the evening. Travelling. I took the Circle Line,operated by SMRT, for the first time that evening. The train ride was pretty nice, especially at the front, where unlike the train operated by SBS Transit, the emergency exit had a window. I got off and transferred at Serangoon. The walk was really long. Did not walk very fast, for fear I might become unwell once again. Got onto the train just in time and headed straight for Harborfront Station. I was to meet my lecturer and some friends for a nigh of German Cuisine at Brotzeit, #01-149 Vivocity. I arrived on the dot at 8pm, and the queue was really long. Perhaps it was Friday night. We got a table for 4, and we learnt the pronunciation of some of the German food on the menu. We did not really order food in German(which I was looking forward to nervously), but we did learn that some of the ingredients were flown in from Germany! Wow. I ordered the German style of fish and chips. Instead of the coleslaw and mashed potato, it came with mushrooms and a unique sauce. The fish was really tender and nice, though, like other dishes, the price was high, but still affordable. We had desert, and it was really good! Definitely value for money! We chatted about a possible future educational trip to Germany which would last 2 weeks. I would very much like to go on that trip as well, but sadly it clashes with the schedule of the California Challenge in June. 2 great trips, but only 1 me. I definitely want o take on the California Challenge, but at the same time, I wanted to go on the educational trip to Germany. At 10.15pm, we went off. Not only did she offer t pay our bills, she also offered to give us a lift home! Wow thanks lots!

Saturday was the first day of the long holidays. my holidays were going to be slightly longer than most students this year. For me, I return to school only on Wednesday. Anyways, Saturday was spent more on resting, gaming, and a little on studying as well.

Sunday morning. Happy 44Th Birthday Singapore! I woke extremely early that morning, before falling asleep again till 10am. Studied in the morning, before going out for lunch with parents at Chinatown. We went to Chinatown square as they were looking for a Chinese stall to have lunch at, but as we had to walk a long way to get there, we decided to return to the hawker centre instead. At Chinatown square, there were many stalls selling all kinds of toys. They ranged from as early as the 80s to as recent as this year. Great place to get old stuff at low prices which look as good as new too.

After lunch, we bought dinner and supper before heading back home at 3pm. Slacked around till 6.15 when the parade was telecast 'live' on television. Did not go head down to take photographs, as I would be alone for the whole event, and my brother was already going there with the camera to take some shots with his friends. This year's parade was definitely better than last year. The displays, decorations, plot were a lot better. The aerial displays, theme song and fireworks were not as good as last year. The fireworks were better to look at, however, it did not last as long. Wondering how much better it could have been if it lasted a couple of minutes longer.

Today, I was gearing up for the examinations arriving in less than 2 weeks. Slack in the morning, did some Math again in the afternoon, and took a nap after that. I cried out a name again this time, though it wasn't as loud and clear as the first time a few years back, where I woke my dad, who came to check on me. Went to study a little more, before I continued slacking for the rest of the night.

Tomorrow, I don't think I'll be doing as much math as I did today. Tomorrow, I'll be doing and completing my IA case study so that I could submit it for checks on Wednesday, in case I had to make some changes to the mistakes.

Hey, I enjoyed this afternoon lots. Didn't really expect you to be there when I only had thoughts in my mind. So much I wanted to say, but I couldn't. Longing for the day where I could meet you once again. Always dreaming of that one day I could finally see the real you. Would you grant me this one wish?? Oh and by the way, sorry if the post was long and boring as usual.

Approximately 4 More Weeks

This week has passed really quickly, and I find I am gaining the momentum to start revising intensively for the examinations which are arriving in 4 weeks' time.

Have not been feeling emotionally stable this week, as it feels as though everything's piling up, and yet I'm not doing anything. Have to start reducing the pile to nothing from Sunday. Today had a practical test for IA, went relatively smoothly, and due to a silly thing I did to the program, I ended up losing marks. Before that, went to Level 6 to study in the air-con with the remaining third of the class while the first shift was having the test. Instead of studying, we ended up slacking, listening to music, playing games and lastly, enjoying a buffet! Yes, a buffet, but on a very small scale. A member of the staff (a lecturer I guess) brought a trolley load of disposable plates and cutlery together with food packed into dispocable containers(those used to pack takeaway food from your neighbourhood hawker centre)! 2pm, the second shift left, and the first shift came to enjoy the food. I left at 2.20pm to do some revision at a more quiet place with friends.

Well, that's about all for tonight. Long day tomorrow, so I guess I might turn in early tonight, and wake early tomorrow.

11th Week

This week was full of ups and downs. This week was filled with miracles. This week was great. This week is past.

I did little this week, getting back papers, reading through notes, understanding new material, chatting with friends, CCAs, slacking off. Next Monday, is when the action begins. I'll cut down on computer activities, and catch up more on all modules.

Today I overslept after dreaming a dream that seemed too good to be true. I woke up, got changed, packed my bag in 5 minutes and left for school. I managed to reach the classroom in just 30 minutes after leaving home. Got back the last paper, did worse than expected, and I started accumulating assignments again today. IA practical left me lost in the first 5 minutes, but somehow, after looking around I managed to connect everything with much ease. After little explanation, I felt as though there was something in me, guiding me through every single step. It was as though a miracle was unfolding in front of us.

Let's see. Results. I underperformed last term, scoring 3As and 2 Ds. All the A grades I scored were A+ grades, while I had 1D and 1 D+. A+ for Industrial Automation, Engineering Mathematics 3B and Applied Mechanics. D for Introduction to Advanced Mathematics. D+ for Thermodynamics. Clinched top few positions for IA and EM3B. Introduction to Advanced Mathematics was supposed to carry a failure grade at 45points. I was given 50 after some changes were made. Thermodynamics, I did all I could, though it was last minute. On my part I did not practice enough. However, our tutor did little to help us during the tutorial period. Is he not allowed to at least show us the important stuff to note in each chapter when we are doing the tutorials? We enter class to complete the questions, submit and go off. It's almost similar to having a class test, except that discussion is allowed. So, when everyone does not know the ful solution to a problem, and the tutor does not help remedy the problem, all we could do was to be sitting ducks waiting to get bullets punched into our heads in the examination hall.

Alright then, I have decided. Anything that I do not know, I'll just shoot it at the lecturer, especially for the weaker modules. This is my last chance for the semester. I'll grab it, and let my grades to rise back up to 4.0.

These days, I feel it growing. It's no longer what we feared it would be. I am sure this time, it's for real. It would not fade like before. The time hasn't arrived although it's ready for take off. I'll wait for the winds to be in our favour, and I'll wait for the day you decide to enter the cockpit with me.

Retrace

So far this week, things have been going fine, and a miracle occured today. And, after Monday's training, I have been limping around as I have not been attending regular trainings due to my health and commitment problems caused by my 2 core CCAs. Honestly, I never joined the school's Taekwondo club for the belt ranks, nor did I join the club to take part in competitions. Ultimately, I did not join for the sake of CCA points. I joined it to maintain my fitness(very effective but tough training schedule which I'm afraid I might not be able to cope with as time passes) and also to gain some self confidence. I have promised a member of the alumni I would train hard as it is not cheap to convert from a federation to another. So, chances are, I might leave after the inter varsity-polytechnic championships next year, and return for ad-hoc trainings once in a while to keep fit.

There was no school on Tuesday, so I took the time to relax for the whole day, to get out of the holiday mood I had been having for a long time since April. I did nothing, other than sleeping and reading up on notes.

Yesterday, I got back my paper for EM3B. I finally managed to find myself at the same wavelength as my lecturer during the 10TH lecture. I'm so going to stay at that frequency until when the holidays arrive. Went home at 4.20 instead of 5pm as the chapter was very straightforward. I was involved in a phone conversation with 3 others which lasted for 2 hours. Wow. That's really a record for me. At least I managed to understand why some people are able to stay on the phone for such a long period of time.

Today was a great day. The start wasn't that great though. The lecturer for 13TH was really generous on her break time today. We were granted a 20-minute break from 9.30 till 9.50 this morning, shortly after we got back our papers for checking. 10TH lecture again at 11, but it ended just 20 minutes after we started at 11.15. Went with the class for lunch, before rushing off at 12 for IAM tutorial. Got back my papers as well. Went for a break from 1 to 2 before continuing with the lecture till 4. I thoroughly enjoy the lecturer's lessons. I am never able to find a chance to fall asleep during her lectures, which I do not find to be boring at all. In fact, I'm always looking forward to the next time I would be attending the class! Went home, took a short break, before heading back to school for Videography once again. Today, was a day of miracles.

Tomorrow, I would be getting back my last paper to check. Tomorrow, it would be a long day with many things waiting to happen. Tomorrow, might be the day I get to chat with everyone again. Tomorrow, is the last day of the week. Tomorrow, is the end of week 11.

Indeed, I guess it's time we should retrace our steps.Hoping for a miracle always.

Day One, Week 11, Semester 1, 2009

Today, was supposed to be a good start to the new term. At least the lessons of the day were. Managed to grasp everything that was taught from start to end, and as expected, things would start to get messy once again. Had AM, TH and IA. For TH, the tutor was the best. He sent us on a tour, before getting involved in it as well and we got down to business 20 minutes later. As or IA, well, I did better than what I had expected(grades would be discussed at the end of the week).

Rushed home, accessed the internet to see what events there were for the Asian Youth Games, before leaving for school again, forgetting to turn the computer off.

CCA was still alright, except that, I seriously doubt my readiness to participate in the PA competition next Saturday. At the moment, I am definitely not ready. Even the instructors think so through their comments. Perhaps, I'll give it one last shot next Monday during training, and decide if I really want to take part, or wait till the next competition in March next year. While I noticed the seriousness of only training on Mondays, I'm losing out in many things as well. I have too many commitments that I hardly have time to study. Perhaps, the time to really sit down and decide what to keep and what not to keep, is drawing closer with every passing day.

That aside, I realised that after I recovered from a virus which made me run a fever and flu(don't worry, it's the seasonal flu), my stamina has been decreasing slowly. I go on my usual evening run every weekend, but I noticed, each time I went for the run, the distance I could cover without walking was decreasing. Come Saturday, I'll start from scratch again, with the 3km route, slowly increasing it to 4km, 6km, 9km and finally, 14km. There's about less than 6 months before the 42km marathon in December. Good thing I have the usual trainings on Monday, free time on Tuesdays and Saturdays to prepare for it. I have decided. Once I enter my final year, I'll commit to only 2 CCAs(the first and last I ever joined). I have thoughts of joining Badminton in the second semester of the final year, but I'll put that aside till we're closer to that period of time.

Once we enter the weekends, It's time to get down to business to make that final 7-week sprint for the FINAL.

Returning to Calm

It's been a week since the school holidays kicked in, and for now, things seem relatively calm. In less than a week's time, new challenges would start pouring in like water, and I would be frantically struggling to handle one thing at a time. For the rest of the semester, I have a one day holiday every Tuesday till October when the second semester begins. That provides me with the hope to regain my streak of As which I lost during the common tests.

This week, I'll start off with CCAs, and with the mornings from 1 to 3am to do some studying. Next week, we're back into the stormy, turbulent sky. Here's one of two poems which I composed the night before. The second one seems relatively long, so I would not be placing it up here.

Among the stars,
She lay on a stream of moonlight

Beaming with hope,
She looked down upon the world.

From the depths below,
He gazed into the wonders of the skies above

Among the moonlight,
He saw her lay elegantly on a star.

I'm getting close, I really am. I got lost once, but not this time. I know it, I really do. I took many wrong turns before, but this time, that route just has got to be the ONE. It's just a matter of time, before I reach that next stop for a gift that would stay by me for a lifetime, like most gifts do.

Common Test June'09

This week has been one of the most physcially and mentally challenging week of the semester. 5 papers spread over 4 days, lots of last minute work, accompanied with other stuff that I could have totally ignored.

Monday was AM, and this was one of 3 papers that was purely last minute effort. 100% do-able, would get at least a B grade.

Tuesday morning, was purely suicide. I entered the hall with only 3 hours spent on revision the night before. If I could even pass, it would be a miracle. The afternoon, was more like a stress-reliver for me. Unlike the morning IAM paper, the EM3B paper was a breeze. I finished it in a record time of 50 minutes(the fastest of all my papers for common test this semester). Definitely an A+ grade.

Wednesday, I went in with lots of mixed feelings. TH was the only paper which I did not drink any coffee 30 minutes before entering the examination venue. 30minutes is the time taken for the coffee to take effect. This was the third paper which I did some last minute revision. I did the paper as with little difficulty, but came out with lots and lots of different answers from my friends. A definite pass, but the grade I'll be getting for it would not look good. Went out for a run while getting some fresh air, and helping a friend think of a solution to her problems at the same time that evening. Met Xing Dan on the way, and she showed me a new route that was more challenging than my current route. Would be trying that out tomorrow evening if there is time.

Thursday. Nothing happened, except for a revision class for IA, which cleared up lots of my doubts.

Today. Woke up full of energy at 10, but within an hour, the brightness of the day faded away. I became extremely moody after that. At 12pm, I left for school. Studied for 2 hours before going to the classroom for the IA common test. I'm confident of a B+ grade, but if the marking scheme is lenient for question 3, I would not have much of a problem scoring an A. After the paper ended, went to the market with friends, and went to the Alumni Club House for an urgent meeting which went really well, and I enjoyed the dinner.

Estimated grade tally: 1A, 2Bs, 1C, 1F.

All right then, that's all for today. I doubt many things would be happening over the weekend.